


Fooled Ya

by Amazilia_beryllina



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: April Fools, April Fools' Day, F/F, Other, Pranks and Practical Jokes, absurdity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-27
Updated: 2016-11-27
Packaged: 2018-09-02 11:49:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8666380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amazilia_beryllina/pseuds/Amazilia_beryllina
Summary: Holtzmann would never let an April Fool's Day pass her by. Holtzbert makes an appearance because, hello, it's me.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I know I’m writing about April Fool’s in November. What can I say? I’m a rebel ;)

The Ghostbusters arrived at their headquarters just like any other day. Abby started the coffee and checked for messages. Kevin literally stumbled in and checked for messages on the decoy phone (there were never any messages but he had yet to catch on). Holtzmann and Erin strolled in hand-in-hand, Erin giving Holtz a peck on the cheek before she headed for her lab and Erin headed for the coffee, Holtz making it halfway up the stairs before running back down to give Erin a big, sloppy kiss that left her blushing and smiling. Patty ambled in and cheerfully greeted the others as she headed up to her third floor library. Nothing was out of the ordinary, until they heard Patty yell something unintelligible and storm down the stairs.

“Holtzy! Girl, I know this was all you!”

Abby, Erin, and Kevin all exchanged curious looks before running up to investigate the commotion in the lab.

“Holtz, show yourself!” Patty was standing in the middle of the lab looking slightly deranged with bits of multi-colored paper clinging to her shirt and sticking out of her hair at all angles. Erin covered a laugh with her hand, Abby didn’t attempt to hide her mirth, and Kevin alerted an unamused Patty that she had something on her shirt.

“That’s a good look for you, Pattycakes.” Holtz emerged from behind a pile of scrap metal, an innocent look on her face.

Patty raised her eyebrows and pointed a finger in her direction. “I know you are responsible for this. Who else rigs my book to spit confetti at me when I open it, I ask you that?”

“Oh, because it’s April Fool’s Day. I get it,” said Kevin, a pleased smile on his blissfully unaware face.

The realization of what this meant could be seen on the others’ faces. Patty, Erin, and Abby shared a concerned look before turning their gazes to Holtz who was relaxing against her workbench, wearing a smirk and a look of crazed power in her eyes.

Erin sauntered over to Holtz, batting her lashes and giving her best flirtatious smile. Before she could open her mouth, Holtz spoke. “Sorry babe, not even you are safe on this most esteemed day of pranking.” Pouting, the physicist turned and followed Abby back downstairs.  
Patty ventured upstairs to gather a few books and her laptop before heading downstairs, figuring there was safety in numbers. Abby and Erin were careful as they sat down in their seats, scanning for any booby traps around their work areas. Kevin plopped into his chair, sending it rolling a few feet back as he tossed some lumpy chocolate candies into the air to catch in his mouth. Abby sniffed her coffee and took a tentative sip, giving Erin the all clear when nothing tasted off.

The three women began to work, putting any potential pranks out of mind until Erin opened one of her desk drawers and let out a startled yelp. “Ummmm…” 

Abby and Patty jumped up to take a look. Erin’s desk drawer was lined with thick plastic and filled with water. A few colorful little fish were contentedly swimming around their makeshift home. 

Kevin peeked over Abby’s shoulder. “The phone is missing from the drawer aquarium.”

“That’s…sort of nice,” said Abby.

“Yeah, not as bad as I was expecting,” said Erin slowly, her voice tinged with suspicion as she sat and watched the fish swimming laps. Erin’s eyes widened a bit when she heard a whirring sound just before noticing a colorful plastic object pop up from the inside of the drawer. A small squirt gun began to spray a stream of water that hit Erin smack dab in the face.

Patty let out a low whistle. “Wow, if she’s going after you, truly nobody is safe.”  
Abby helpfully handed Erin some Kleenex to dry her face before returning to her own desk, chuckling as she went.

Kevin smiled and nodded, as though that’s exactly what should happen when one finds that fish have taken up residence in their desk drawer. “Enjoy your aquarium,” he said, spinning on his heel and heading for the coat rack. “My Cornhole league has back-to-back practice today.”

“Wait, Kev—“ Abby, too distracted by the ringing phone on her desk to finish her sentence, let this one slide. “It’s not as if work will be left undone without him around,” she muttered, picking up the phone. 

Hanging up a few minutes later, she informed Erin that they had a bust, before yelling out to alert Holtz. Turning back to Erin, she asked where Patty had gotten to. Moving for their lockers, Erin quickly answered “bathroom” a second before the woman in question shout out Holtz’ name and came storming out of said bathroom. 

“What in the sweet hell!” Patty whipped around at the sound of the engineer sliding down the pole to suit up. “What gives, trying to give me a heart attack like that?”

Holtz ducked behind Erin who shot her a questioning look. “Pops on the underside of the toilet seat,” whispered Holtz, never taking her eyes off of the irate historian. 

Holtz casually shrugged, “it could’ve been anyone, Patty, they weren’t meant specifically for you,” before darting out from behind Erin to quickly grab her suit.

“That does not make it any better. You’re lucky we have a bust to get to you tiny, crazy person.”

~*~  
Immediately upon entering the converted fire station, Erin made a beeline for the second floor bathroom. When it became apparent that Erin was going to rarely avoid being slimed during a bust, Holtz had installed a top-of-the-line five jet showerhead to remove even the most stubborn of ectoplasmic residue. 

As the three ectoplasm-free members of the team carried in the equipment and hung up their suits, they all turned when a frustrated groan followed by Erin stomping—as much as one can stomp in wet bare feet—downstairs wearing a towel and holding up a bar of soap.

“Holtz,” she said through clenched teeth, “what did you do to my soap? And don’t give me any crap about how it could’ve happened to anyone. We all know I’m the only one who ever gets slimed.”

“The old coating the soap in clear nail polish trick,” Holtz boasted, crossing her arms smugly and looking to Abby and Patty. Erin let out another grumble of frustration, drawing the blonde’s attention back to her, before turning and stomping back upstairs.

Holtz jumped to attention and followed Erin up the stairs. “Erin, my little spaghetti-o,” Holtz cooed, draping an arm around her girlfriend’s shoulders as they continued walking. “Are you maaaaad?” 

Erin gently elbowed her away when they reached the shower, then quickly grabbed at her towel that threatened to fall off at the movement. Holtz leaned in to whisper in Erin’s ear. “How about I make it up to you?” Erin watched as Holtz pulled a new bar of soap out of her pocket and began to unsnap the straps of her overalls. “Back scrub anyone?”

~*~  
When Erin and Holtz made it back downstairs, Abby let them know that she had ordered lunch for everyone. The bust had lasted through lunchtime and, with knowledge from past experience, they were all running the risk of becoming hangry. That, and Abby didn’t trust that Holtz hadn’t done something to the food in the kitchen, so she’d ordered Chinese. Holtz shrugged and nodded at this accusation. “That’s a legit concern.” She ruffled Erin’s hair before heading to her lab to begin routine maintenance on their packs before lunch arrived.

While Patty paid for the delivery, Erin began unpacking the food and handed over the wonton soup when Abby made grabby hands for it. She popped off the lid and spooned out a mouthful, immediately spitting it out once she tasted it. 

“What the…this is iced tea! Really gross iced tea.”

Abby, Erin, and Patty all looked up when they heard an evil chuckle. Holtz was watching them from the railing that overlooked the first floor, smirking at yet another successful prank.

Patty scratched her head. “How in the…”

“Fire escape,” shrugged Holtz. “I intercepted the delivery. Had that,” she pointed at the container in Abby’s hand “tasty concoction in the lab since yesterday.”

Abby could only splutter at her. “Oh, come on Abby-cadavers. There’s a 74% chance that on any given day you’ll order wonton soup. Don’t fact check me on that.”

Abby was still working her jaw when Holtz stepped back from railing to continue work in her lab. Turning to Erin and Patty, Abby clenched her jaw and shot them a look. They nodded at her look, knowing exactly what needed to be done.

~*~  
Around 4 o’clock, Holtz slid down the fireman’s pole and headed for the kitchen. The other three women shared a quick conspiratorial smile before looking busy again when Holtz walked past them to the stairs, winking at Erin when she looked up from her work. In an attempt to play it cool, Erin shot her finger guns and a toothy grin. Patty rolled her eyes from behind her computer at the painfully awkward—yet adorable—exchange.

A couple of minutes after Holtz made it back upstairs, a guttural yell rang out. Drawers could be heard slamming shut before footsteps came pounding down the stairs and back to the kitchen. After a couple of cupboards slammed open, Holtz, arms rigidly at her side and fists clenched around a Pringles can, marched into the office area. “What even is this?” To emphasize her words, Holtz pulled off the lid and a pile of cardboard Pringle-shaped cutouts popped out of the can. “You even got to my back-up stash.” She pulled an already open can out of her back pocket and dumped it on the floor, a few carrots and a piece of cauliflower rolling across the floor toward Abby’s desk.

Unable to keep a straight face, Erin and Patty burst into laughter at the offended look on the engineer’s face. Abby stood up and pointed a gloating finger at Holtz, proceeding to do a little dance that apparently required her to repeatedly shout “gotcha!”

Recovering rather quickly, Holtz straightened up and announced that she would make a trip to the closest convenience store for some more of her beloved snack. This set Abby off laughing even harder, Erin bit her lip and avoided eye contact, and Patty walked over and gave Holtz a sympathetic—but not too sympathetic because confetti and pops—pat on the back.

“Don’t bother, baby, no store within a ten block radius will sell you Pringles.” Holtz turned her eyes on the taller woman, a look of disbelief in her eyes. “Yeah, all those people we helped around here after the near apocalypse thing? They were inclined to do us a little favor. Also, who knew your girl could get her flirt on like that, damn.”

Holtz’ eyes moved to Erin, the look of disbelief morphing into one of exaggerated betrayal. “Erin, light of my life. You flirted with other humans? And to pull a prank on me, your beloved, no less? I’m wounded.”

Erin frowned and walked around her desk to Holtzmann. “You know it wasn’t like that. Besides, you had this coming.” Erin bumped the other woman with her hip, eliciting a small smile that quickly bloomed into a full-blown grin. 

“I’ll admit that I’m impressed. Touché, my friends, touché.” Walking over to Abby, Holtz held open her arms for a hug. “No hard feelings.”

Abby laughed and accepted the hug. “Of course not, Holtzy.” Pulling out of the hug and holding up a finger in warning, Abby continued, “but if you ever mess with my soup again, I will go with my original plan of licking the flavor off of every single one of your Pringles before placing them back in the can.” 

Scandalized, Holtz looked over at Erin for confirmation. The brunette nodded gravely. “Thanks for talking her down, E.” Erin winked and motioned for Holtz to follow her into the kitchen, Abby and Patty returning to their workspaces to pack up and head home for the day.

Once in the kitchen, Erin bent over and pulled a storage container from a lower cabinet and handed it to Holtz. “I didn’t have the heart to throw them away.”

Opening it, Holtz let out a whoop and wrapped Erin in an almost painful hug. “I love you!” 

“I know.” Erin fondly watched Holtz stuff a stack of Pringles into her mouth from the relocated stash that Abby and Patty had removed from the cans for their prank.

Heading to their separate workspaces to retrieve their own belongings, Holtz called to Erin from the stairs. “I almost forgot, check your bottom left hand drawer.” Erin furrowed her eyebrows, recent events eliciting a lingering suspicion, but opened the drawer anyway.

“Aw, thanks Holtz.” Erin held up the small fish bowl that came complete with rocks, decorations, and a net for her April Fool’s fish. 

~*~  
The four stood on the sidewalk while Abby locked the main door, laughing and teasing each other about the day’s various pranks. 

“What I don’t get is why you didn’t prank Kevin,” said Patty. “That is one easy target.”

Holtz slung an arm around Erin’s waist as they all took off down the sidewalk. “I did prank him. I left a box of chocolate covered pearl onions on his desk.” She scratched her head. “He proceeded to eat them all. And enjoyed it.”

Abby nodded, thinking that this made perfect sense.

“I think I’m offended that he didn’t offer us any,” said Erin.

They all laughed and said their goodnights, heading off to their respective apartments for the night.

~*~  
The next morning, Holtz had a hip propped on Erin’s desk, watching the fish swim to the top of the bowl to nibble on the colorful food flakes Erin dropped in. Abby was pouring herself a mug of coffee when all of a sudden a loud pop and a scream rang out from the bathroom and echoed throughout the station.

“Hooooltzmaaaann!”

“Whuh-oh,” said Holtz, immediately standing up. “I might’ve forgotten to remove all of the pops.

The bathroom door slammed open and Patty charged out. “Nuh-uh,” she said, a finger wagging at Holtz, “that cutesy innocent face won’t work on me.”

“In that case…gotta go!” Holtz made a run for the stairs, Patty hot on her trail, their antics providing at least a solid ten minutes of entertainment for Abby and Erin who, after things had settled down, decided to err on the side of caution and do a sweep of the fire station to make sure Holtz hadn’t accidentally left something else behind. 

Kevin wandered in and sat a bag of onions and a bowl of melted chocolate on his desk. “Hey guys, I discovered a great new snack. Who wants a taste?”

Abby patted him on the back. “Never change, Kev, never change.”


End file.
